Ep. 11: Two Funerals: Eastern Wisdom

Ron Swanson is mourning Salvatore by having a drink at Tommy’s Bistro and runs into his old nemesis, Ron Dunn.

Donna Meagle:

“Buck up Swanson, it’s like you said, death is natural. And Sal lived a good long life.”

Ron Swanson:

“But so much is changing, and I’ve never been a fan of change. Salvatore was a constant in my life.”

Ron Dunn:

“In my experience, the only constant is change.”

Ron Swanson:

“Ah sh!t.”

Ron Dunn:

“Nice to see you, Ron. I couldn’t help but over hear, sure am sorry about your loss. You know every time we lose compadre our collective lantern gets a little bit dimmer.”

Andy Dwyer:

“Hey you look awful familiar. Have we met before?”

Ron Dunn:

“Oh, I’m sure our souls have collided in one lifetime or another.”

Andy Dwyer:

“No, that’s not it. Are you in my frisbee golf league.”

Ron Dunn:

“Oh, yeah, I play for the Super Spinners.”

Andy Dwyer:

“Oh, I’m on the Frisbee Champs.”

Ron Dunn:

“Oh, cool.”

Andy Dwyer:

“I named us.”

Ron Swanson:

“Andrew, stop speaking to this man. He is the worst human being on earth.”

Ron Dunn:

“Oh, com’ on. Death makes brothers of us all. I always found that when my soul aches with loss, it’s best to turn to Eastern Wisdom.”

Ron Swanson:

“This is from the isle of the Islay in Scotland. This is as Eastern as my wisdom gets.”

Donna Meagle:

“Swanson, this handsome spiritual cowboy may actually be right about turning to the east. I have an idea, trust me?”

Andy Dwyer:

“Who cuts your hair?”

Ron Dunn:

“Nobody. Whenever my hair feels it has completed its journey, it simply sheds itself off.”

Ron Swanson:

“I hate you. So much.”

Ron Dunn:

“And I love you my brother.”